It went a little something like this: If yo Priest lives in the big house and ya parishioners live in the po house, that ain’t right! If the Reverend has a chef, and the congregation eats whatever’s left, that ain’t right! If ma Minister got a real nice suit, and all the church folk got holes in they shoes, that ain’t right!
Then he looked right over at us and said, if the Bishop got a BMW spinnin’ on dubs (fancy rims) and the members drive a Pinto that needs a jump start and a shove, THAT AIN’T RIGHT! Whaaat! We looked at each other, we looked at the Pastor, was he for real trying to call us out for being Mormon in front of the entire congregation.
Another time at a different church the Reverend was inviting people to come up to be prayed for. When no one was coming up on their own the Reverend decided to call for those who needed prayers.
It went a little something like this: This young sister right here is 20 years old has three kids, two baby daddies and a one baby on the way, let us pray for her. Church this brother came into my office and said Reverend, I have transgressed. Church do you remember that he has been in AA? Well he has not been attending his meetings and just this morning he had a sip. Let us pray.
This got us thinking how glad we are that the LDS church does not have a portion of Sacrament meeting where we can share other peoples business or call people out. Can you even imagine it! You know that sister or brother in your ward that gets up every Fast and Testimony Meeting and tells all their business and we’re all thinking TMI, TMI, TMI! Well imagine if they could tell yo business.
It would probably go a little something like this: I just wanted to take this opportunity to share my testimony. I’m grateful for the Word of Wisdom and how it has been a protection to me and my family, let me be the first to admit that I struggle with the need to drink a diet coke occasionally, but it is nothing compared to the trials that Brother Brown and his family have to deal with because of his addiction to alcohol.
I promised myself I wasn’t going to do this, (as she starts to do the Relief Society fan and cry) but I’m so grateful for Sister Leak, she is such an example to me of the type of mother I’d like to be to my children. I mean, she makes it look so easy raising all those children alone. I don’t think I would be strong enough to send my children to their fathers (plural) homes knowing that they were being taught things there that are contrary to what we believe. But she has faith that things are going to work out and that Heavenly Father is aware of their needs and she has been right so far. She is such an amazing example of a woman of faith. I know that if I can learn to have faith like her, that Heavenly Father will remember and not forget me.
Brothers and Sisters, as Bishop, I am shocked at the long pauses between testimonies. There are many of you here who have had your testimonies strengthened just this week. For instance you there Sister Jones, the Lord has blessed you, the DNA test could have gone the other way, but it did not. You and Brother Jones are now blessed with a family. Come up and testify of how God answers fervent prayers.
Let’s all take a deep breath and on the count of three say it together…1-2-3, That Ain’t Right!!! Like our Aunty use to say, “If the Lord ain’t talking about it, neither should you!”
God is Great,
Sista Beehive & Sista Laurel